Monday, March 19, 2007

Experimenting with drugs

posted Thursday, 29 June 2006


weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.




Its a stupid phrase. Its always being said by those people who in order to appear responsible and not lie about past drug use, say something like "I experimented with drugs in my youth." This way they make you think they are honest and that they are clean. Perfect candidate for political office, right? I mean what does experimenting mean anyway? You werent sure what would get you high, so you approached it scientifically? Let me guess, this guy sat down with leaves from all different trees, like some elm, oak maple, got some rose petals, maybe some pine needles, and smoked every single one, till he dicovered (eureka!) marijuana. (of course with the obligatory white coat/big glasses guy standing by with a clipboard.

The fact is that stoners are the smartest people on the planet. Everyone knows that. They are always coming up with original ways to get high (despite much persecution). The fact that someone even figured out that if you take a simple leaf, crush it, roll it and smoke it gets you high, shows some real creative thinking. I wonder how many false starts they had with that 'experiment'. The early pioneers in this field probably tried smoking tennis balls ("nah too bouncy, and smells like burning crap) or aluminum cans ("whoaaa, like too sharp around the edges man")and even dried bat dung. (interesting thing to try on rainy days) And thats just the smoking aspect. I can't even begin to imagine how many things they sniffed till some doofus dicovered coke. I'm sure it didnt take long for them to realize that it had to be a powder.( "aaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhh!!! aaaaaaaaah!!! get it out! get it out, Its crawling around and eating my nose"!Aaaaaaah! Why do I always get the animal section of this experiment?) But the question is when they actually realized that most powders dont do much aside for making your eyes water and your nose run. (not mentioning the ones that burn and make you sneeze) These people deserve a medal for actually cracking (no pun intended. I promise. really.) it. Maybe we Should elect druggies into office, they prove they have the brains for it.

15 comments:

trix said...

guano

shalva said...

Yeah - I always had the highest admiration for those brilliant serial killers who never get caught. May I ask why you're blogging about drugs? Some "experimenting" you'd care to share with us? And do you think snorting garlic powder will give you a rush? I should try it. Hmm... maybe I'm onto something.

flor said...

then i expect you'll elect the kid who discovered sniffing school-glue will give ya jags??

shalva said...

And what about those choking games? And deoderant? Brilliant, just brilliant.

doodlehead said...

trix- bat dung just sounds less smokable. guano is probly a cig brand in cuba. shalv- well, think abt it, g-d created so many plants, statistically shouldnt there b more of them w/a pleasant affect when smoked?we gotta start experimenting. flor- of course. u want the kid who thinks outside the box in office, not the dull teachers pet who puts the glue on the paper and only on the paper.

swfm said...

Yup I agree and those that drink that say they only do it on weekends those are the alcoholics as well. Same as experimenting with drugs. True the smartest ppl out there are the stoners/wierdos

shalva said...

d-head, i want the kid who sat there reading dostoyevsky at recess while the rest of his class was playing football. ;)

trix said...

hey, I only drink on weekends.

ddl- in the olden days they didn't have meds, so they had to experiment with all the plants to see what worked for what. so they discovered that garlic gets rid of vampires, camomile tea makes you feel better, and pot makes you hi. but it was a good theory, if you take out all fact.

doodlehead said...

that doesnt mean that all the people coming up with novel ways to get high (like whiteout, or shoe polish, or even mixing ammonia, snake venom, and rasperry syrup together and injecting the mixture)or novel ways to sneak stuff past authorities,or even pass drug tests (theres this cool website that sells urine so ppl can pass the urine sample test)shouldnt be acknowledged with a position in office. We dont have enough smart people in govt. Yes the kid reading during recess can be smart, but book smart is not nec. what u need during a crisis. (you need someone who can get high wherever,regardless of how many angry union mobs are attacking his front door with shovels and rakes ;) jk)

trix said...

someone who would buy from that website isn't smart enough to plan for the future. if he just thought about the drug test before he got high, he would have some spare

flor said...

(re: spare, ever see american beauty? ;) )

doodlehead said...

trx-not if hes high 24/7. and if hes a frequent shopper by this website.

celly said...

Most of our goverment officials seem pretty high. You never know.

doodlehead said...

the ones getting busted doing stupid things are definitely not stoner material.

jewmaican20 said...

....right.